Movie date

There's nothing new in going to the movies on a Sunday. This morning was no different, only it pertinently was. It was my first movie date with my daughter. She's four and her first-ever movie outing will always be with her mother and it will be The Junglebook. Mowgli, be damned, but for Prisha, this will be her formal entry into film entertainment outside the idiot box, and of course the iPad.

I still, uncannily quite, remember my first movie viewing at a theatre. It was Qayamat se Qayamat tak. Yes, you heard that one right! And my invincible (almost!) crush on Aamir Khan started from that moment on.

Anyway, the reason I wanted to pen today's experience was because 'firsts' are always special, right? The first walk, the first word, the first day at school, the first birthday, the first job, first kiss, etc etc..it's quite endless, really! But innocuously it just ends up being one of those life aspects that's given significance (sometimes unduly so!).

I'd been meaning to take my daughter out for this 'first' time movie experience for a while and today, just felt right and Mowgli was introduced to her, and in 3D! Yes, there's technology engulfing us from every corner, it seems and one that we so readily accept.I actually loved the movie, honestly and loved it a wee bit more because my li'l one was curling up to me every time Shere Khan almost jumped out of the screen into our laps!

I know for sure, I'll remember this 'first' for a long time to come and one that I hope my daughter remembers somehow too. The first mother-daughter movie date got to be special, right?

Comeback

Emotions flood as I read the pages written eon ago. It almost seems like a different lifetime, yet it's not.

I'm a mother now. She's four years old already. Back in the place that most people call the 'city of dreams'. Dreams that you once had, dreams that you've achieved, along with dreams that went unfulfilled, but you never stop dreaming.

Sometimes, just at times, there comes a time in life when all you want to do is Stop. Stop running, proving, deciding, moving on...the endless cycle of life. And for me, the time is as good as it is now.

As I rigorously try to catch up with all the facets of my own life, trying to play 'perfect' to the best--a mother (a working mother!), wife, daughter--in the rigmarole of it all, somehow the 'me' slowly dissipates. Somewhere, if you're not careful, the 'I' takes a backseat. And probably its a natural process, or something that the social milieu expects. Yet at the core, the 'unsettled' I seeks, dreams and continues with the journey.

It's like a paradox of sorts. Settled, yet not so. Yearning to explore the unknown and striving for perfection all along. Its a life always in progress.

As I get back to this page after years, all I know now is I'm coming back here often now. It's more fulfilling than what meets the eye. I've always been one with few words; but written words flow seamlessly, as does the desire to fly!  

Little things life's too short for (inspiration: GLAMOUR)

1. Savings especially when you have to let go of that lovely dress from ZARA
2. Not splurge on a branded watch and bag, at least once
3. Missing the girls' night out after ages because boyfriend's home alone
4. Making work the escape route from all other things miserable
5. Ignoring parents' calls just because you don't feel like talking
6. Missing the BIG SALE because you 'should' spend time with your parents when they're in town/partner
7. Not going for an annual holiday
8. Letting others' inefficiencies get to you. IGNORE or better still, overlook and move on with YOUR life
9. Not exploring the world
10. Not taking chances, professionally and personally, because you're skeptical
11. Letting go of that huge opportunity because you had to make a choice, and then regret
12. Not being vain at times
13. Moaning over your frenemy
14. Avoiding some ice cream

Back!

Well, well, well...it's been over a year-and-a-half and I've been away...from being on my site. I don't quite know what held me for so long in just clicking a link, but somehow, it didn't beckon me either. Life has definitely moved on since the last time I posted.
Am back in Mumbai, settled would be more like it. I particularly do not like the 's' word though. It almost reverberates like 'this is it!' And I hate that feeling. Everyday I want to do something new, be in a new place, live where my heart takes me...so on...
So, for those few who just might be interested:
Life in Mumbai hasn't changed much. Am back in the office I once so loved, and still do (notwithstanding my occasional grumbling attitude, of course!). The truth is I love what I do. I love watching FTV. I love clothes. I love writing on it and more (how to look good, feel good, be confident and avant garde) and I love my job so far.
Does that mean life is pretty perfect? I guess it never will be...coz there's always more to life than this...right?
More soon...

Starry destiny

I do not believe that someone can foretell your future...what is destined for you. Nonetheless I am curious by constitution. So I'd be lying if I told you I have never been to a soothsayer. It's amazing how they predict what lies in store in your future. Sometimes, it's utterly untrue, as has happened in several instances, and on some rare occasions they actually turn out to be true. And the latter part is what fascinates me the most. Can our stars/planetary positions indeed determine our destiny. Are we destined in merely the starry way? The answer, I believe, isn't so simplistic. I hear there's science involved. But if one could foretell one's destiny ever so nonchalantly, as someone did, very recently, what is it that i can do to make my own destiny? Can I never make my own destiny? Are we, really always, born with it? I still wonder at that unnerving thought...the idea that I have no control over my future, it's predetermined, preordained and that possibility is jarring indeed.

Blissfulness

Bliss...

1) Sitting in a shack, by the sea, and absolutely doing nothing (imagine Goa!)

2) Lying next to my partner, when my eyes meet his...no words said, yet meaning the world.

3) Feeling the happiness of my parents when I am around.

4) The pride in delivering a successful project at work after sleepless days and nights.

5) Travelling to places just to explore, experience and absorb.

6) A meetha paan after a heavy meal.

7) Just his smile, when he's happy, and when we are together.

8) Feeling wanted and needed by best friend.

9) Kadak masala chai on a monsoon ridden day.

10) Just being 'me' with people I love.

Motion

Even when I am surrounded by family and friends, I feel dislocated. It haunts me...this itchiness of not belonging anywhere, yet being somewhere. I try my level best to consume my surroundings, be a part of where I am, but incongruably I can never feel static. It's motion that drives me, gearing for the next big challenge, the next big change...will there ever come a time when I want to halt, take a breather, live life in one place...I doubt if that time's going to be anytime soon...