Emotions flood as I read the pages written eon ago. It almost seems like a different lifetime, yet it's not.
I'm a mother now. She's four years old already. Back in the place that most people call the 'city of dreams'. Dreams that you once had, dreams that you've achieved, along with dreams that went unfulfilled, but you never stop dreaming.
Sometimes, just at times, there comes a time in life when all you want to do is Stop. Stop running, proving, deciding, moving on...the endless cycle of life. And for me, the time is as good as it is now.
As I rigorously try to catch up with all the facets of my own life, trying to play 'perfect' to the best--a mother (a working mother!), wife, daughter--in the rigmarole of it all, somehow the 'me' slowly dissipates. Somewhere, if you're not careful, the 'I' takes a backseat. And probably its a natural process, or something that the social milieu expects. Yet at the core, the 'unsettled' I seeks, dreams and continues with the journey.
It's like a paradox of sorts. Settled, yet not so. Yearning to explore the unknown and striving for perfection all along. Its a life always in progress.
As I get back to this page after years, all I know now is I'm coming back here often now. It's more fulfilling than what meets the eye. I've always been one with few words; but written words flow seamlessly, as does the desire to fly!
I'm a mother now. She's four years old already. Back in the place that most people call the 'city of dreams'. Dreams that you once had, dreams that you've achieved, along with dreams that went unfulfilled, but you never stop dreaming.
Sometimes, just at times, there comes a time in life when all you want to do is Stop. Stop running, proving, deciding, moving on...the endless cycle of life. And for me, the time is as good as it is now.
As I rigorously try to catch up with all the facets of my own life, trying to play 'perfect' to the best--a mother (a working mother!), wife, daughter--in the rigmarole of it all, somehow the 'me' slowly dissipates. Somewhere, if you're not careful, the 'I' takes a backseat. And probably its a natural process, or something that the social milieu expects. Yet at the core, the 'unsettled' I seeks, dreams and continues with the journey.
It's like a paradox of sorts. Settled, yet not so. Yearning to explore the unknown and striving for perfection all along. Its a life always in progress.
As I get back to this page after years, all I know now is I'm coming back here often now. It's more fulfilling than what meets the eye. I've always been one with few words; but written words flow seamlessly, as does the desire to fly!
No comments:
Post a Comment